So I finished my paper on how the United States will become more sane. I wrote it on the Banking Concept of Education. While writing the paper, I began to realize how many things actually connect. I was shocked to see that ridding this concept actually would help the population to fulfill their human needs. From there, I started to think about how my classes are connecting. Many of the themes talked about in my core lit class correspond to the themes talked about in my human behavior class. This is probably because both are centered around the theme of who am I? What do I know? and given what I know, what can I know? I like to be able to use alternate examples to further produce arguments in the class.

This week I feel as if I am head over heels in homework. With practice every night, club meetings before that, and then the need to eat, it is so hard to find time to get everything done. Luckily, it has been doable so far. I'm usually really good with time management but this is time management at a whole new level. Balancing family, a boyfriend, friends, schoolwork, clubs, work, and sports is probably one of the hardest things about college thus far. The temptation to go out at night is so extreme, especially when your all-time favorite movie is playing only a few doors down or the girls are going into Providence to go shopping. It becomes really hard to say no and sit home and study.

Sane Society

The assignments in college are so different than assignments in highschool. I feel as if I am swamped in papers, reading and studying. It's actually, for once, nice to have math! I notice that I am tending to save my math homework for in-between breaks when I get bored of reading or studying. What is also different from highschool is the context of the reading. For the last ten years, when asked to read for homework, it was generally out of a textbook. Reading for college is completely different. You are given novels that hold some sort of underlying meaning which relates to the class. From this novel, you are challenged to make the connection as to what that is. I am actually enjoying this way of learning much better. Textbooks were never appealing, and at least with the novels, they hold stories and plots.

One novel that I was asked to read for Human Behavior was "The Sane Society" by Fromm. This novel essentially outlined why the United States is not a sane society. For a paper due Friday, we are asked to propose one change that would make the United States sane. This change needs to be something that we, the students, can change on our own on campus. Along with that, the change needs to be significant enough that if everyone did it, the world would be more logical. I have tried thinking so much about this so much that it seems to be driving me crazy. I am going in so many different directions with where I could go with this assignment. First off, I could talk about censors and media. This is a HUGE topic and is very controversial. Obviously, the censoring of media would provide a sense of more self-importance and self-confidence. When I was almost certain that I was going to write about that, I did my homework for lit class. For homework, we were asked to read about the banking concept of education. After reading this, I was thinking how if all classes were held as discussions, the campus would be more sane. This "sane society" would arise because people would feel more comfortable in the classroom. So, thanks to Lit, I think that I have found the topic for my paper. After just writing this blog, I came up with even more ideas of where I can go from that. I believe that from there, I am going to talk about the idea of pass/fail instead of GPA grading. Writing everything down in this blog certainly helped me find out which argument would be more convincing and more powerful. Now off to write that paper!

Exam time.

Today I should get back my first exam that I have taken at college. I'm really nervous, I hope that I did well. I want to start off on a good path, and I hope that I will. It's much easier to keep a positive trend going, then to reverse a negative one. Although I really knew the material, I felt as if my essay did not say as much as I wanted to and express my ideas clearly. I really hope that I did well.

In Italian, I have my first exam on Wednesday. I feel as if I know the material pretty well, it's just hard because I don't know the professors' style for exams. Hopefully all goes well. Although the entire class is in Italian, somehow I'm understanding it. The professor is really good about making hand gestures and using his emotion to convey his message. I heard the other day that he is the head of the language department. Whether or not this is true I'm not sure, but I think it's kind of cool that I'm in his class. He's very educated in the language and points out fun facts to help us remember things. For instance, the professor told us that "venti" in Italian means twenty. A "venti" coffee at starbucks is called "venti" because it is twenty ounces. I like hearing about this kind of stuff because it makes it seem as if it applys to my life. At home, I work in an upscale Italian restaurant. The walls and the menu are covered with Italian words, so it's nice to hear them in class and be a step ahead of the other students. I never thought that knowing the menu for a menu test would help me pass my first college class! One interesting thing that I learned was that our restaurant name, "lui lui", means "he and he". Knowing that, I figured out that it is because the restaurant is run by two owners, both being male. With a background of eight years of French, I find that my French is helping my Italian as well. For all my life, I have attended private Catholic schools. These schools put a major emphasis on the French language, starting us all off with French in fifth grade. When I reached freshman year in highschool, the middle school actually changed to start everyone off in first grade. As much as I hated taking French, I continued with it throughout highschool because I knew it'd be an easy A. I believe that looking back, it was a good choice because all of the grammar and pronounciation of the words are extremely alike between the two languages.

Although we have had no problems yet, my roommates and I ran into a problem late last night. Because of this, I was up until three in the morning and am now exhausted. Unfortunately, today I had my first test (what a coincidence) in Literature. I had an 8 am class as well, which went surprisingly really well. The professor gave us this assignment to take one of our papers and peer edit it. I feel as if I did a really good job on that paper and the boy correcting it didn't find many things to change. I was very pleased with the outcome. He made some great suggestions and I'm actually a little excited to fix them and see how it turns out. My professor is really great and does an awesome job of explaining everything. From this Expository Writing class, I feel like I have already learned so much. Just comparing my papers that I'm writing now to my older papers, there is a huge difference. My arguments are better constructed and my ideas are clearly more organized. I'm really happy about this because I know that I really needed improvement in that area. In highschool, I had always been in college level classes for writing. Unfortunately, I am not great at it. Math is my thing. That leads to another problem, being my idea of leaning towards psychology for my major. I have heard a million times that I should be in engineering or biology, something rooted in math and physics. Unfortunately, I do not have a passion for those at all. I know that I want to go with what I like, rather than what I am good at. Hopefully this works out!

So far, the workload of college hasn't been too bad. I was feeling like I was on top of things, and I still partially feel that way. The work is getting harder, and the days seem to be getting shorter. With my newly joined clubs and organizations, my involvement in the cheerleading team, and my job on campus, it is so hard to find time to do work. I feel as if I spend every moment not at meeting or classes in the library. I have managed to stay really on top of things, I just hope that the work load doesn't get too much harder. It's only the third week of school and I have an exam , a paper due, and a quiz all tomorrow. I really want to do well, but I hope I have the ability to do so. I am a professional at time management, I'm just not sure there is enough time in the day. I am even budgeting in writing this entry between class and cheerleading, it seems like it never ends. Unlike some people, I require a full nights sleep to function the next morning. One way that I've been staying motivated is thinking that if I get all this work done, I won't need to do it this coming weekend. I'm going to try to keep that mentality so that I don't have too much this weekend.

Today in Human Behavior, the professor gave us a lesson on morality. Although I didn't agree with some of his standpoints, I really agreed with one. The professor's main message for today was about judging others before knowing them really well. Like everyone else, I've heard this speech a million times, but the way he said it really made all of us think. He put it in the terms of every person is like the sides of dice, all different. But even though we're different, we're all part of the same peice. He told us that in a matter of four questions, a person can usually find something that they have in common with another. We tried in, and it proved true. I know that some people in my class are very different, ranging from the President's daughter to an outspoken environmentalist. Today in class, I was taught a valuable lesson on judgement and presuppositons. I was really happy that the professor did this.

In the last few weeks I've learned something I never thought I'd admit: that my mom saved me all throughout high school and junior high. The hardest transition to college is the fact that I'm forced to completely rely on myself. This not only means in terms of schoolwork, but also on household projects as well. Last week, my roommate came down really sick with a double ear infection and a sinus infection. After a few days, I began to feel pretty bad as well. It was really odd to be sick, and not having anyone there to tell me to rest and take my medicine. I was completely independent. When coming to college, you expect that you'll notice your parents aren't there to help you with the big things, such as shopping and financial things. But in reality, you realize their abscence the smallest things. Coming from a household where my parents left complete trust in me to do things on my own, I feel like I have done really well for being on my own so far. I am thankful that they brought me up in a way that I can make rational decisions about how to handle myself and manage my time. At the time in highschool, I would constantly bug my dad with "why aren't you helping me with the dishes?" or "balancing my checkbook is stupid." Now that I'm here on my own, I truly appreciate all that my parents did for me to prepare me for college. Although it is going really well, it still feels weird to be making decisions without them.

From watching others, I try to see how I do not want to act. As others go out until four in the morning on thursday nights, I personally prefer to stay in and watch Grey's Anatomy. I hope that with the absence of rules, I can continue to keep my head on my shoulders in these next few months.

One thing that I've realized about college is that it is easier to do well. In your dorm, you are surrounded by hundreds of other people who want to succeed. The University supplies resources such as the library, the coffee shops, and the common rooms, all so that you have a quiet place to go. For Human Behavior, I was just assigned my first group project. Unlike highschool, there were no guidelines. The professor said "Take these three pages in the book, and do something with them." In the rubric, he said that creativeness plays a major role in your grade. Our group decided to do a skit of what happened in the story, then teach the class about the information by playing hangman with vocabulary. It ended up being really fun and the class was really involved. We got the grade back the other day, and we received an A. I was really happy with the outcome. Normally, I am a very structured person. I feel as if I do not have complete control, it won't go smoothly. I learned through this that sometimes you just need to trust others and it will all work out.

Another thing that I'm learning is to rely on others. I am beginning to learn of all the resources that can help me with my studies. As I wrote in my blog before, I am not a language learner. I thought that Italian would be much worse for me. As I also mentioned before, I have a girl in my class who lives in my dorm. Every night, we get together and do our Italian homework and listen to audio clips online. If we have any additional questions, I met a girl who leaves two doors down from me that speaks fluent Italian. She has been a huge help to both of us and it's great to have her to answer questions. Aside from Italian, I also had someone in my dorm help me with writing. When writing a paper, it's so easy to have it proofread by a good amount of people. I feel like I'm doing well here, and I hope that it continues.

Conflicts.

As the week went on, classes continued to go smoothly. There was only one challenge that I faced. This problem was an 8 am class. As much as you say that you'll go to bed at 11 pm every night, it's nearly impossible. Living in what's known as the loudest dorm on campus, the action doesn't seem to calm down until about two. The first week on campus, it was really hard to get into the schedule. I thought that I needed to be involved in every event that was taking place on my floor. I have finally learned that it is possible to get to bed at about twelve. You always feel like a nag when asking the roommates to turn off the lights and be quiet, but in the long run, it works out for the better. You learn that they don't really mind, and most of the time, the roommates are tired too. I've noticed that since this, I've been much more awake for classes which is always a good idea.

Another conflict that I've reached during these last few weeks is finding adequate study time. Coming from being an only child with working parents, I always had the empty house to fully concentrate. Now, being in a forced triple in Cedar, it is a huge adjustment. At first I thought that I was in huge trouble academic-wise. One roommate is always watching TV, while the other is constantly playing rap music. The door is always open, and people always stop in. One way that I have learned to adjust to this is going to the library. I go there at least twice a day to do my homework. I finish all my reading and studying there, then come back to the room to type up notes and make study guides. This has worked really well for me. Hopefully it works just as well during the winter months.

So Confused

After that class, I was off to Italian. I would have never found the classroom if it wasn't for my student advocate which showed me around the day before. The class is located at the end of a long hallway in the architecture building, past a whole row of cubicles and a construction lab. It is possibly the most unlikely spot for a language class. Upon arriving in the class, I found my friend Sarah who lives on the same floor as me. We sat together in the class. The professor was really nice, or at least he seemed it considering he was speaking all Italian. He spoke once sentence in English. The professor goes, "I have a dog, that dog probably understands more Italian than you do. The aim of this course is to surpass my dog." We all laughed at this, not only because it was funny, but because it was probably true. I'm still unsure of why exactly I took Italian. When signing up at Orientation, the lady helping me figure out my schedule said it'd be a good idea if I want to study abroad, which I do, but to tell you the truth I have no true passion for languages.

As I mentioned before, I'm completely undecided as to my major. Truthfully, it's a very scary subject. Once arriving on campus, a good amount of people seem to know exactly what they want to do. I always think to myself, "Why can't I be that lucky? Why am I so unsure?" My roommate knows exactly what she wants to be. She's double majoring in legal studies and psychology and plans on going to law school to get her degree then become a lawyer. I hear peoples majors and think to myself, "that sounds like something I could do!", but nothing really strikes me as something I'd like to do for the rest of my life. On the contrary, one girl that I met seems to completely detest her major, and it's only the first semester! Whenever she is asked her major, she replies with "ughhh, Political Science." I don't want to be someone who hates what they're doing. I'm hoping that in the next few years I can figure it out. To help speed up the process, I am taking a bunch of core classes, which dabble in every subject. Hopefully, if this does anything, it will weed out the subjects that I do not want to do. I've always been an inconsisent person. I'm one of those people that changes her mind every day about what she likes and doesn't. I think my biggest problem is that I like too much. Everything sounds fine to me, which leads to so much confusion when it comes to choosing a major. I know that I'm not alone in this situation, sometimes, it just seems like I am.

My First Class

Wednesday was our first day of classes here at college. I stressed out all Tuesday night organizing and reorganizing my books and notebooks. To tell you the truth, I was so unsure of what college really was. All a person hears is that it's so different from highschool in every aspect. I had no idea what to expect. I kept getting this terrible image that everyone would show up with laptops, and I would be sitting there in the middle of the classroom with my bright orange notebook and pen. Tuesday night I went to my RA. I asked him all of my questions about what to bring to class and what exactly to do. He was really helpful. He told me that basically everyone uses notebooks, thankfully. Also, he told me that getting there early is a good idea so that you can have a good seat in the front. He said that this would help out with acheiving a personal relationship with the professor, and help me pay attention. After checking my alarm about ten thousand times, I finally fell asleep with anticipation of what was to come.

The next day, I woke up extremely early. I had a nine o'clock class, so I woke up at 7:45 to do my hair and shower. At about 8:45, I started headed over to the building that Human Behavior was taught in. When I arrived at the class, I sat between two sophomores who were really nice and helped answer any of my questions about what to expect. Then, the professor came in. I realized that I had nothing to be afraid of. He seemed like a very easygoing guy; he's even letting us call him by his first name! For that first day, we went over the syllabus. The work load was a lot. By Monday, we were expected to read 150 pages in a book by Fromm.

Everyone was right. Judging by that class alone, college was really different. It was so weird to look around the classroom and see people drinking coffee and eating snacks. One kid behind me even pulled out a breakfast sandwich! It was really weird to see people having their phones on the desk too. In highschool, that would have been confiscated in a second. Coming from a Catholic school, it was also really odd to see people wearing whatever they want to class. I felt so informal and really independent. The professor talked to the class like we were equal with him. I finally felt like an adult.

First Day On Campus

To continue from my last blog...

I finally finished moving everything in, with ten minutes to spare before convocation started. The weather that day was unbelievably hot. I drank a bottle of water, changed into shorts, and headed over to convocation. We were all brought into the field house where we stood behind the banner that stated our intended major. Being undecided within the major of Liberal Arts, I stood behind the Arts & Sciences banner. We were assigned our robes and processed to the outside tent to begin the program. Because of the heat, the speeches were condensed and fortunately it wasn't too long. The speeches were awesome and got me really excited to start my journey as a college student. After convocation, we processed back into the gym. On the way, I saw my parents on the side and they signaled that they were going to leave. I went over, gave hugs, and said goodbye. Although most parents have a really hard time sending their only child off to college, mine didn't seem to have a problem. I know that they're extremely proud of me and are truly excited to see how I grow and develop in these next few years. Also, I know that they're just plain excited to sell the second house, renovate the lakehouse, and vacation whenever, wherever. :)

As they walked away, I realized that I'm here alone now and it's up to me to make the most of this. I headed back to my dorm with my new roommates and friends. Truthfully, I thought that I'd call my parents at least ten times that night. With all the great events and people to meet, it came to midnight before I realized that I forgot to call.

Leaving home

As much as you hear about what it is like leaving the house for the first time, you never really know what it feels like until it happens. The last day at home was really emotional. On top of saying goodbye to my best friends who have been with me since the process of schooling began, I was also forced to say goodbye to my boyfriend. It didn't phase me yet at all that only one day later I'd be saying goodbye to my parents as well. My thoughts were "College will never top highschool" and "I'll never meet friends like these." I never thought that college would end up feeling like home.

The next morning wasn't any easier. I woke up extremely early to leave New Hampshire for the three-hour drive to Rhode Island. Although it was early, I wasn't able to sleep. The anticipation to meet my roommates and move-in took over instead. I spent the entire ride text messaging my boyfriend and talking to my parents about how I was nervous and wanted to stay home. My parents advised me that it was going to be okay and that if I try my hardest to make the best of it everything would turn out okay. Then, they proceeded to give me a lecture on partying and how negative decisions will affect my schoolwork, for the ten millionth time. As we pulled in with the Yukon XL loaded to the ceiling of stuff I thought I would need, shivers ran all through me. It was then that it hit me. This is college, and this place was now my home. When I arrived it was around 8:30. Luckily for me, one of my best friends was an incoming freshman as well. I thought at least if I didn't make friends I would have him to hang out with. :) As fate would have it, he pulled in the parking lot directly behind me. We walked in together to register and then went our separate ways, him going to Maple hall and me to Cedar.

Pulling into the Cedar parking lot was such a welcoming sight. There were teams there to bring in our luggage and help with anything that we needed. I ran up to the table, grabbed my room key, mailbox key, and a cluster of papers necessary for college life. The RA for my floor walked me to my room and let me in. There stood one of my roommates. She had already been there for one night and was barely awake. From what I could tell from our brief conversation, she was a very nice girl. Seconds later, our third roommate showed up. Despite our obvious differences, we seemed to click really well. We all laughed and joked while moving in about how much stuff we brought. I mean, who needs 10 sweatshirts and 12 pairs of shoes? Luckily my dorm was located on the first floor, so bringing in everything wasn't too much of a struggle. My mom and I spent the afternoon organizing and reorganizing everything. My dad set up anything technical so that I wasn't given the chance to mess it up. The moving process was overall a smooth one, and a great start to the beginning of my life as a college student.